Saturday, March 31, 2007

Bi Rain grooves

I'm so excited. I'm now able to also include Rain's video, here at my blog. So you guys/gals, who accidentally bump into this blog of mine and don't know who he is (and for those whom already know) can view sample of his musics, video etc. Left bar. Enjoy!

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Calmer thots towards Bi Rain

Last nite went to visit my cousin. She and family will be flying off to Jakarta late this afternoon and live there for the next 3 years. So now we have a port in Jakarta, whenever we go there we could camp at her place.

I'm on half day leave today, to clear off last year's unused leave or it will be deducted just like that. After paying bills online, I hooked up to internet and still haven't finish surfing on my usual sites on Bi Rain. (another window is still downloading clips fr YouTube). Bi Rain will be in Taipei by now for his concert this weekend.

My feelings are a lot more calmer now, I think. I don't get too excited when I read his posted message in the fan forum. I feel contend that he care about us, his fans. I hope I can maintain this. But I saw some pics where some Thai journalists took pics wt him during his concert in Vietnam. Hmmm 'sigh'...lucky, lucky people.

I bought a VCD/CD package of Gary Chow for a friend's birthday present. Inside has a metal tag of him where my friend hang it together wt her work tag. I envy her. If only I have the same for myself of Bi Rain. It will be perfect.

My Bangkok concert tix in June is confirmed. I'm so looking forward to it.
OK, got to get ready for work.

Monday, March 26, 2007

De-sensoring Bi Rain

I read in a fan forum about how Rain advised his fans 'to always cherish a good man beside them'. This is to answer a question posed by a journalist to him about some fans whom followed him around and ignored their other obligations or other matters around them.

I put off writing about this for a few days bcos I was kinda ashamed to admit that it sounded more or less like me. Though I don't travel the world chasing Rain at his premier or press conference (thou' I wish I can), but I do tend to ignore other matters and important people around me ever since I'm fallen into the Rain spell. I even manipulate certain events/conversation/tv channel/trip so it will divert towards my favourite subject -Rain. Take last weekend for example, the whole family was watching Mr. Bean Holiday at the theatre but I somehow managed to excuse myself and instead I was at Starbucks alone surfing on Rain while waiting for the said movie to end. Another example, last January when trying to book a holiday in Bangkok, I purposely chose a date which coincide wt his concert there so I will be able to go. At family gathering, I will chose Kak Long's favourite topic -Korean drama so she could ask me about Rain and I will update her (whether she likes it or not) on his whereabouts and current activities. But the worst of it all is, I put aside the needs of my family as secondary as compare to my insane, abnormal, immature, indescribable act of 'literally chasing' after a Korean star called Rain.

I must say, the statement made by Rain in that interview did help me a bit in overcome this overwhelming infatuation over him. You see, the more I read about his comments, see his clips in shows and interviews; the more I come to realise that he is just a normal human. I'm so excited to see that he is struggling wt his English lesson, but his trying and that a good sign. To err is human. Don't get me wrong, I don't wish him any ill; I want to convince myself that he is only a normal person wt an exceptional talents. A normal person make mistake and go thru hardship like any of us. So there's no need for me to get all worked up if he's only getting 2-3 hrs of sleep. He chose to be in this demanding industry. And I must, I must appreciate his talents alone; that is what he wanted. He can date, kiss, sleep wt anybody he chooses. That is his rights. But as a normal fan, I will always appreciate his professional talents.

Can I do this? Can I keep this up? For my own sanity, I will and I must.
Aja, aja fightin'

ps/ I'm into the 3rd episode of Sang doo, let's go to school.

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Bunny left us

It was approx. 0815hr when I heard the bad news. Danish and Danial came running to the bedroom wt an awful news. Bunny died. Our 7+ years old rabbit was found dead in its pen by the maid. He was not ours to begin with. Angah and me found him in our old house garden, looking frail, skinny and hungry. We took him in, fed him and searched around the neighbourhood for its owner. When we couldn't find the owner, angah decided to take him in against my wish. So he was wt us all this years ... enduring house shift, trips to hometown, trips to boarding pet shop, a major surgery to remove a lump on its neck, a 6 months fling wt Buffy (female rabbit) - Buffy died 2 months after giving birth to 6 bunnies (all were given away); all of that until this morning, when he decided to leave us.

I didn't say goodbye. I stayed in bed.

Angah dug a small grave for him wt the boys. He was a good Bunny. Never gives us any problem. Angah said he brings us luck. If this is true, thank you my dear Bunny.

We will miss you and we love you.

Thursday, March 22, 2007

A tired Rain fan

My office mate said during lunch that she wants an internet access at home. She was influenced by me. Not that I did it on purpose. All this talk about how I spent my time at home surfing the net looking for any bits of information on Rain, had somehow rubbed on her on how fortunate it is to have such facility at home. But I asked her, are you sure that is really what you want? Why she said? Well like me, having net access at home is no longer adequate. I want more. I want to be able to have access everywhere I go. Hometown, vacation, during leisure even when I sipped coffee after shopping. Bcos I cant stop thinking of what I've been missing. Matter related to who else but Rain. Others I don't give a hoot.

Isn't that sounds like a curse? The Malays call it 'Takde penyakit cari penyakit' -translate: You are healthy but you go and look for sickness. Hmmm... That's exactly what's happening to me. I choose to stay in this maze. And didn't even bother to find my way out of it even thou' its sometimes affecting my real life. About a week ago, Danish asked why do you surf the net for Rain all the time? 3 days ago, he cried in frustration Rain, Rain, Rain. I'm sure there's more to come. And I chose to keep my mouth shut. What can I say? That I'm under a spell? Cant seem to snap out of it? O why o why must I get myself into all this? And now I'm too deep to just ignore the feeling and the whole experience of knowing Rain even if it's only from far.

Our lunch conversation continues; so do you still stay up late to surf? Yes, I answered. But how come you don't look tired or sleepy? I do sometimes but nowadays I'm kinda use to it. But I must admit that it is not an easy work. Just like Rain work hard to satisfy his fans and prove to his critics. His fans like me has to work hard to keep ourselves abreast with updates on him.

Maybe it's just me. But I must confessed, it is tiring to become a fan, especially to someone like Bi Rain.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Rain -ed on them too


This morning on my way to send Danial to his kiddy, we had a small argument. He want to insert Rain's World into the player while I want to listen to Eternal Rain cd. But I gave in bcos it is just a short drive to his school and I changed the cd right after he stepped down the car. Isn't that a feel good subject to argue about early in the morning? It makes me laugh on my own thinking about it in the office. For a 5 year old, he sure knows how to choose his favourite song. Btw his current Rain favourite is 'In My Bed' along with Akon's Smack That.
picture: Danial my early morning cd contender
I was thrilled to found out that my ex-boss who's now residing in Perth, is also a fan of Rain. When I confessed in my email to her about my craze over Rain, I didn't expect her to know him but was pleasantly surprised to find out that not only she knows him but a fan herself. Oohh, I'm so happy. And at 47, she said she won over me any time. Ha! Ha! I love her.

ps/I'm STILL waiting for my Bangkok concert ticket confirmation

Sunday, March 18, 2007

Busy as bi Rain

SMSed a friend at 4pm asking whether she's going to see Gary Chow's mini concert tonite. (she's recently into this Malaysian based in Taiwan singer). She said maybe not since it's difficult for her to get tix. Told her she better find a way to obtain tix or she'll regret it forever, like what happen to me during Rain's concert in KL. I have yet to forgive myself for being so dumb.

Fortunately for this friend of mine, she managed to get tix and was at the concert venue at 8pm. To make it even more special, she wrote a comment on Gary's personal blog that today is her birthday and she will be going to his concert; and guess what, Gary sang a happy birthday song to all his fans whom are celebrating their birthday today. My friend almost cried when he did this (althou' there were a few others whom raised their hands, claiming they are also celebrating their bday today), my friend likes to think it was her email that Gary read and the birthday song was meant for her alone. I think so too as I screamed and shouted in happiness on the phone when she called to tell me. I'm so happy for her!!

and ENVY too.

How lucky for her to be able to read Gary's personal thots and writings in his personal blog. Rain doesn't even have time to even sit still. Every second counts and spell $$$ for him. Even the reply to his Cloud fans is usually done in haste, with maximum 5 lines. Most of he's other accounts were written by his PA (and we are all ever so grateful for that). He has no time and such luxury to even smell the spring flowers in the park. *Sigh*... The price one have to pay for being so popular and high in demand especially in the competitive market as in South Korea where budding artists are emerging by the seconds; more younger, sexier etc.

I love FH final episode. Will start on SangDoo video soon. Been playing Eternal Rain cd for almost 5 times today. In the car (3 times), at the office (stopped by this morning, to finish some work) and back at home.

Hopefully, I'll get the ticket confirmation for the I'm Coming concert in Bangkok soon. If all goes well, it will be 2 and 1/2 months from now. Pls God, pls let there be no postponing again. Pls let there be peace in Bangkok and the whole of Thailand.

Amen.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Full House - last episode

I'm in denial. Tonite I will be watching the last episode of FH. Since this afternoon in the office, I was dreading for tonite. I just don't want it to end!!

I did the unthinkable in the office just now. I said hi to this guy, just bcos he was wearing an army pants and his white shirt has this single red star on it (just like Rain's MV pants and tattoo). Told him I like his pants and shirt. He jokingly asked me 'how about the man whose wearing it? Don't you like him too?' I smiled sheepishly... 'not unless you can sing and dance like Rain'.

God! I'm getting bolder and bolder.

There's work in progress meeting tomorrow afternoon. Apart from my normal reporting, I'm going to suggest to management to consider taking Arirang channel on board.

Wicked!

Okay, got to see the finale of FH. I'm gonna miss the song. 'Weep'.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

I survived

I'm back from Bandung!! Both Plan A and B failed miserably while I was there. No I didn't manage to get online while I was there neither did I read my novel (not even the first page).

Nevertheless, Bi was never out of my mind.

How can I?
1. TV in the hotel room has Arirang channel -i was overjoyed, even to see a few sec of his pic/promos -already made my day
2. I was at a shopping outlet when the store suddenly played the FH theme song; automatically I was smiling to myself (happy to realise that K pop and drama, also a big hit in Bandung) but had to change to humming and singing instead when I realised some curious stares by other shoppers when they saw me grinning to myself while choosing clothes to buy
3. saw Eternal Rain in a cd store - you bet I bought it!

All in all, I'm proud of myself of having to survive the ordeal of not getting any news on Bi Rain for almost 96hrs. Well it's not TOO bad after all.

Present state:
After doing some internet banking, I went online to catch up on Bi's latest/old news which I missed for the last 4 days. Hmm..after Vietnam, he's having rounds of concerts in Taiwan, Shanghai, maybe Sydney, Bangkok and US most definitely. Although, I'm planning to see the one in Bangkok June 2-3, but I thought of having a closer date perhaps.

It's almost 0100hr and I have an important meeting tomorrow (after 4 days of leave).
Guess, the remaining 2 episodes of FH will have to wait till tomorrow.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

96hrs without Bi Rain

We are catching the first flight tomorrow @ 0730hr to Bandung, Indonesia for our vacation. The taxi will pick us up @ 0515hr and I must get up at 0430hr. That's about 3hrs for now!

Angah had delivered the most heart wrenching news. He forgot that he loaned his laptop backpack to a friend and as a result I cant bring along my laptop for this trip. Meaning, I don't have means to access the Internet in my hotel room for the next FOUR days. Meaning NO blogging, NO u tube, NO fan site and NO Bi Rain!!!!

I may have to rely to the hotel's biz centre. Hope they have laptop for hotel customers to use (fingers cross). If all plans failed - as a backup: a 894pages book called 'I know this much is true' and pray hard I survive the next 4 days without Bi Rain.

ps/ I didn't even get to finish another 2 episodes of FH before I leave. Sob! Sob! :-((

Tuesday, March 6, 2007

Real life cyborg story minus Bi Rain

Mar 5
I haven't got time to write properly. Didn't managed to log into the net last nite, bcos I was too busy watching FH. I only have about 1 and 1/2 hr before the clock struck 1230am. Can't afford to sleep late on working day. Just now went to catch up on the net news about the fans meeting.
Looks like everyone had a good time. It was a surprise to see (..well to me at least) that when the camera finally focused at the fans, there were many matured women there. Hmm...so is this the new norm? Older woman fancy younger man?? Ha!Ha! Me included...

I often dance to Rain's 'With U' song trying to follow/remembering his steps in one of the video I watched in a Korean TV programme. Fantasizing that if I get to do the fan show THAT will be my act. (I must be crazy) Saw the Taiwan fans performance, it was exactly like what I imagined my dream act would be..and they won the best performance.

Mar 6
I was driving to work this morning, I had 4th album on the cd player. Through out the 35 mins journey to the office, my subconscious mind was on Rain. His fan meeting, the way he dressed, the FH series I watched last nite (mostly on this), his comment on raising a family. He's been saying this a lot nowadays. Everybody wonders whether he's dropping a big hint or just talk?

Not only after I tagged my security pass at the guard entrance that I realised that I have a friend at the passenger sit. I was so preoccupied wt thoughts on Rain that I totally ignored her presence. Gosh this is really bad!!

I wish Jeong-ssi will find his bride soon. It would be easier for me to let him go. I must find a way to let him go. I'm getting insane by the hour.

Sunday, March 4, 2007

..and so Bi-Rain's saga continues wt me

Went to a wedding at noon. K. Long was following us, so we went to pick her up. Last nite I smsed her and asked if I could borrow her FH dvd? (it is too time consuming to download fr the net). She answered back by saying 'better still I loan you another of Rain's video called Sangdoo, let's go to school'. I want! I want! I was jumping wt joy!!

So in the car, while Angah was driving - K.Long and me were chit chatting about K drama (she watched everything, you named it) well me on Rain specifically. Angah warned his older sister not to influence me further but she said it's okay, I can be her partner in crime. Yahoo! Bless you K.Long!! (to hear it from a person whom is a deputy dean of a school of biz management; felt like a moral booze for me). K.Long was so into Winter Sonata (once upon a time) that when she travelled to Seoul she visited the park/garden. I heard they had turned it into a tourist lure.

At the wedding, meet up wt other relatives. A. Man's daughter is leaving for Tokyo next week to continue her studies. She will be majoring in Sociology and Japanese language. Apparently she was hooked into all things Japan, ever since she watched a Japanese drama serial. K.Long commented, well that's maybe bcos you haven't watched any K drama before. Or else you might be going to Seoul instead of Tokyo. Ha!Ha! We all had a good laugh.

Angah had to drive south later this evening. He will only be back on Thurs. After he kissed me goodbye, I think I detected a look of dejected perhaps? Cruel me. Nowadays, I haven't got time for anybody unless it has something to do wt you-know-who.

Went to purchase some groceries at Tesco. Saw a magazine called Lime at the news stand wt Bi-Rain on its cover. Bought it. Already watched 7 episodes of FH so far. Hmm..I still have 15min before midnite, should I hit the bed or watch a few episodes more??

Well perhaps, just one episode...

Saturday, March 3, 2007

Daily dose of Bi Rain

I have dark circles under my eyes. Thanks to sleeping late every nite.


Angah said he wants to use the internet tonite for banking purposes and wants me to step on it. So after visiting the usual sites for my daily dose of Rain, here I am updating my basic/pathetic -looking blog (compare to other fan site). I am so NOT web savvy. I guess I've mentioned that several times before.


I have a wedding to attend tomorrow, so I have been warned by Angah as not to stayed up too late tonite. He was actually referring to last nite's case. It was almost 0200hr when I finally off my laptop. While waiting for it to completely shut down, I closed my eyes.


I was awoken when Angah came into the room in the middle of the nite, put away the laptop, clear the bed and pulled the blanket for me. Not to mention asking me to change my sleeping position from half sitting half curling to a proper sleeping position. When I asked him what time was it, he said almost 0700am. WHAT??!! I was sleeping in that position for almost 5hrs. It reminds me of the drama FH where the leading girl always sleep at her PC desk.


There will be Rain fan meeting in Seoul tomorrow. How I wish I can be there to absorb the atmosphere and the excitement. Guess I have to be contend wt whatever news, pics and videos leaked out from the gathering.


Next weekend, I'll be going for a vacation to Bandung, Indonesia for 4 days. That's the reason as to why I can't go to Rain's World Tour in Vietnam Mar 10-11. Angah has promised me that the hotel room has WIFI facility. Bless him.


I don't think I can survive without my daily dose of Rain...even on vacation.

The other side of me


A colleague was leaving the company so last nite we had a farewell dinner for her. Those who came are either senior managers or head of unit in their team and much senior than I am. There were about 12 of us there and the Thai restaurant was havoc with our roar of laughter. We stayed until there was only our table left and the owner was kind enough not asking us to leave although almost all of the waitress looked very sleepy and wanted to throw us out.

We continued our conversation outside the restaurant after they had locked the door and switched off the lights after us.
pic courtesy of Bi Rain-Jeong Ji hoon fan site
'Do you know that nowadays she (referring to me) is a big fan of Rain'? began a senior female colleague. 'Oh no, not you too', added a male colleague. I just smiled awkwardly wt my eyes facing down, not saying a word. 'She plan to watch his concert in Bangkok', chipped another friend. 'You mean you are actually going to catch him all the way there'? Good heavens, said another senior manager, I never would have guess. You really don't look like one!!

What he meant is that from my outlook, I don't fit the bill as someone who would be a fan of Rain. The same guy once commented he likes looking at my face bcos he said I portray a picture of calmness. Ha!Ha! Guess nowadays he doesn't see much calm bcos my heart and head is already in turmoil ever since I discovered Rain. Actually, the conversation about me and Rain lasted more than 15min wt a friend mimicking how I would act if Rain's video is shown on TV screen and the time I almost strangled a male colleague when I heard he actually went to Rain concert while I was desperately looking for a partner to go. At first I was embarrassed when the conversation had suddenly focused on me. But after seeing some admiring looks from some of the colleague suddenly I kinda felt relieved. Some male colleagues started to compare their six pack or (rather beer tummy) to of Rain which had everyone laughing.

So last nite some of my office mates learnt about the other side of me.

The 'not so docile' me. The so unlike me.

The other side of me.